One of my favorite things about living with my dad is dinnertime. I can usually get him to launch into some story or another about the past, and every once in awhile there will even be a new story. I am going to work on taking notes on as many as I can and get some video as well. The old stories change a little each time. So who knows what the "truth" is, but does it matter? Or are they all truths in the moment?
A family story which pops up frequently has to do with his family's "migration" to California. I have heard it many ways, but these are always the common elements:
A friend of his mother's was writing letters, begging them to come to California from Iowa.
They sold all their furniture and packed everything else they could fit into one car.
When they got to the California border, they got detained and searched. They took a bunch of food they brought and some other stuff as well. He always mentions how they almost took their ham. At first it was a small canned ham, but it has progressed to a "huge ham" at times. :)
His dad was so mad, he thought he was going to kill somebody.
Another guard finally told the one hassling them to leave them alone.
He always talks about how it reminded him of the movie The Grapes of Wrath.
I think my dad was around junior high age when they made the trip. I am planning to ask him if he has any other memories of it besides the CA border. It is tricky because he seems to need to find his own way to memories. If I ask him if he remembers something, he usually says no, but sometimes it is like planting a seed. I will bring up a topic, and even if he says he doesn't remember, later that day he will often start out with something like, "You know, I have been sitting here thinking about the time we drove from Iowa to California..." It is fascinating and sad at the same time. I am also going to start a Life Story project I will print out and add to from time to time. I think it will help to give him some sort of purpose if I tell him it is something his grandkids have asked for.
More to come...
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